Case of the Monday's

Sitting here, staring at this screen. That's what I've been doing for the the past 3 hours, blank. Add a good meal in between and all of a sudden my mind begins wandering, searching for ways to get me over there, onto my bed. I fell for it once, but I knew that if I stayed down long enough my house would probably burn down due to this portable heater being on HI all night. It's still cold. The weather is a trip by the way. An interesting day it has been. The creativity comes and goes, so does the motivation. I've been stuck, trying to figure out a concept for a short story I am writing. I've always been into horror, tragedies, and mysteries so I won't be surprised if I stick to what I am used to. But I do like to step out of the box every once and a while. Grade A procrastinator, not proud but I own it, have accepted it, and am changing it (soon). Should have started this story a week ago, planned on it, didn't happen. Thanksgiving break was good to me. Now I pay or maybe not. My eyes are heavy and I might not make it. If I do close these eyes, they'll see 6:30 a.m. the next time they open. Oh well.

Monday's are something else (I'm sure you were wondering when this post was going to coincide w/the title). The energy was barely there, it was hard waking up this morning, what can I say? I went to sleep late, for no reason in particular. Every day that passes by, I learn something new about myself. Today I learned, Monday's aren't necessarily my strength. What I mean is, we state that Monday's are the "Beginning," "The fresh start," "The day you press the reset button." Bologna (funniest word spelled, hands down!). I've tried convincing myself, isn't happening. Trying to discipline myself to work according to the Monday's, it isn't going down, yet (have faith, that's deep huh? ha). It wasn't a bad day at all, it just lacked the amount of substance I had wished for. That means I've got to work harder, obviously. My goal is to go hard seven days a week, so I'll take one step at a time.

Distracted, all the time. Where's the focus? I'll find it and when I do, I hope it's at my earliest convenience. This would be the perfect week for it to do so. Wait, why aren't I typing my story again? Because I'm too busy blogging (something I fell off doing in the first place). Priorities, priorities. I am a mess, LMAO.

Oh yeah, the blog is coming back soon. Revamped and consistent.

Thanks for reading my randomness.

UNTITLED (HOW DOES IT FEEL?)...

NO, no, no ! this is not on the D'angelo standing naked flexing his A-A's (awesome abs) type of post. But my question is, How Does it Feel? Dealing with people these days, maaaan ! To be completely honest, it's hard and slightly annoying. WAIT ! let me change annoying to frustrating. Alright, so we all have our own lives; responsibilities, priorities, interest, and we make our own decisions. We are all grown here, aren't we? I mean, I think so... I don't know about anyone else, but carrying myself is enough weight for me. I deal with my life daily (as i should) and it's not that easy, but not as hard as others. I enjoy it ! Of course I have those days where I feel down and out, but I then try to change that negative energy to positive energy. Let me just say this while I remember (i'm getting sleepy)... I've always been that person to help others, trying to make people smile and laugh, making them feel better and what not. Being a TRUE and GOOD friend. I'm not saying I am retiring from that because that is who i am... BUT (yes there is a BUT); i am saying this in the most unselfish way, It's time to focus on me (all attention HERE; *points to self). I'm not pushing anyone away (take it how you want it) but it is what it is. I'm never going to stop being there, it's just that people need to learn how to live their lives, do what they need to do to make themselves a better person, and their lives better. I can't live for you or be your tour guide, shxt i don't even have the directions to my own life (haha). From now on, if a solution to a problem is not an option... i am not talking about it... because that is all that is going to be done (talking). cliche shxt to say; it's 09 and its the year of Change... this year, RIGHT NOW ! shxt changes... it's time to move forward. To Rise. One more thing, I've always been one to hold my tongue, I've gotten more blunt these days... so expect me to keep it 100% + holding no words back :) people don't always want the truth; but i'll warn you first. If you ask, you shall receive. I won't be an axxhole about it nor will i apologize... so, HOW DOES IT FEEL? :) haha...

i am still working on me; there is so much to life that i plan to explore... i can't wait :) life is good...
_thank GOD !